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How to Win a Girl's Heart

May 08, 2017

So there’s this girl that you’ve had your eye on for quite a while, but you have no idea as to how to win her heart. To be honest, it’s really not as difficult as Hollywood has made it out to be. Girls aren’t some Rubic’s cube that requires an intense amount of intelligence and perseverance to crack through, you know. They are simple creatures. If you meet their basic demands, there’s no way they are going to reject your advances.

How to Win a Girl's Heart

Having said so, I know that every girl is different much as the guy who wants to win her heart. So here’s a mix of various wooing techniques that are applicable to girls of different temperaments, as well as techniques that different guys can comfortably adopt.

1. Avoid becoming her friend

The thing is that girls view friends as just friends. And till the time you don’t make her intentions clear to you, you’ll be treated as a good friend. This is why you need to make your intentions clear from the very beginning.

Also, keep in mind that if you DO tell her how you feel and she doesn’t feel the same way but still wants to be friends with you, it’s not called being “friendzoned”, but called being rejected. Don’t be salty about her not liking you – she’s not obligated to.

2. Pluck up

And when I say this, I don’t mean pressuring her to say yes when she’s made it clear she’s not interested in you. No. What I mean is that don’t let your fear or hesitation come in the way of introducing yourself or talking to her. If you’re not going to take the first step, then how will you work on how to win a girl's heart?

3. Surprise her

The easiest way to catch a girl’s attention is by surprising her. And how do you do that? It’s completely up to you and your capacity, as well as what she likes or dislikes. Chocolates, flowers and teddy bears are way too cliché. Make the effort of knowing about her passions, and revolve your surprise around that. So for example if she really loves dogs but can’t keep one with her due to her apartment policy, take her to your local animal shelter and let her have the time of her life surrounded by dogs the entire day!

4. Respect her

Clichéd, but still needs to be said. Do not take her for granted and do not treat her like a doormat. Show her your manners and do things the old way – holding the door open for her, or pulling her chair when she sits. It may appear stupid or even embarrassing to you, but in her mind, she's already pegged you as a gentleman. And girls, those who are willing to commit, are very easily attracted to such men.

5. Compliment her

Not every single time that you see her, obviously, because then your compliments lose value. But every once in a while compliment her on her looks, her dress, her hairstyle, her perfume, and her beautiful smile. Do make her feel valued.

6. Open up to her

If you want her to open up emotionally to you, then you’re not gonna make it happen if you don’t open up to her yourself. Share with her your vulnerabilities, innermost fears, childhood memories, your weaknesses or your embarrassing secrets. That shows her you trust her enough to share such important details with her. It’s going to make her feel special because obviously nobody goes about sharing such details with every random person, right? However, make sure the conversation doesn’t turn too serious.

7. Be creative when it comes to your dates

Everybody goes to the movies, amusement parks or even sit and talk at coffee shops. Do something different with her. And no, it doesn’t mean you have to blow all your money on that date.

You can easily do it on a low budget. Take her on a hike or a long bike ride. Spend a day at the beach, have a good old fashioned picnic, talk to your heart’s content and watch the sunset together. Take a pottery class together or even a salsa class – the options are limitless. It ultimately depends on what YOU want to do when you’re working hard on how to win a girl's heart.

8. Make her more involved in your life

If you want her in your life, then you have to make the extra effort of making her part of your life, you know. You can’t just expect her to involve you in her plans when you’re not involving her in yours. Send texts, make calls, hang out with her when she's with her friends, invite her to your friend’s parties or barbeques…you know how it goes.

9. Be a good listener

The thing about men is they’re terrible listeners. And when I say terrible, I‘m actually being very polite here. Pay attention to what she has to say. When she’s quiet, ask her to talk to you. Always include words like how, why, what, when, where in your conversations regularly. Make her feel she’s important to you by listening to what she has to say.

10. Never call her your friend

Especially if someone asks you in front of her who she is. Call her an acquaintance, a colleague, a peer or pretty much anything except a friend. Because once she gets it in her head that she’s a friend to you, she’s going to treat you the same way – like a friend. All your efforts on how to win a girl's heart will be dashed instantly.